Pintester Movement

Welcome, new readers, to my blog!  It’s a bit dusty, but I have plans to renovate it and ramp up the posts.  I figured the Pintester Movement would be a good incentive for me to get writing.  For more information, check out this link!

First off, I’m so jealous of Sonja Foust, the writer of the Pintester blog.  She has my ideal job: crafting, writing, and getting paid to swear.  Really, what better job is there?  After swearing like a sailor all through college, stopping now that I’m back home for the summer is incredibly difficult.  I don’t like it, not one fucking bit.

So today, as part of the Pintester Movement, I will be testing not one, but two whole pins, just for you!  One will be food, and the other will be a craft.  Aren’t you lucky.   I’m jealous for you.

First off, the food.  I was originally going to remake a coffee concoction I had made last week and fake it like it was my first time (yay for hidden meanings).  It was delicious, and I knew I could handle melting chocolate on stove, even though who even has time for that?  When we make chocolate at Christmas, we microwave that shit.  We’ve got it down to a science, bitches.  But then after an early job interview, I decided I needed some Starbucks, which I have been desperately craving.  One fancy coffee is enough for today, this isn’t exam week. So instead, you will get my attempt at lavender lemonade!

I have an intense love affair with lavender.  If I could own a lavender/unicorn farm, I would drop out of college right now.  By a series of random events after getting our hair cut, my mother, little sister, and I found ourselves in the midst of a Lewis and Clark celebration, complete with battle reenactors, time-period appropriate food, and a group of campers, camping as settlers.  We wandered for a bit, our stomachs growling, when we happened upon a tent selling herbs.  I saw lavender and freaked out a bit, as I’ve been searching forever for edible-grade lavender to use in this recipe.  I’m not buying that shit online, I don’t trust you, Chinese whole sellers   As it was my birthday, my mom bought me a butt-load of spices for my new kitchen, including that elusive lavender.

This was the only recipe I found that called for a little lavender, instead of a cup or so.  I’m not wasting my precious purple flower on some Pinterest pin.  Here's the recipe, if you're interested.

The packet of lavender from the celebration.

Gathering the supplies.  I might have bought a few too many lemons.  Oops.

Steeping the lavender (Doesn't that look appetizing?)

Waiting for the lavender to steep, I started writing nonsense on a handy pad of paper.  I'm kind of in love with my cursive.  Yes, I'm a huge fan of Sam.  What can I say, he's everything I'm looking for in a man: troubled, good with a gun, and part demon.

Squeezing the bejesus out of those lemons.

The undiluted lemon/lavender water concoction.

The final product.

Final verdict on the lemonade: not bad.  It's different, and it smells kinda weird  but it's delicious.  The lavender adds just a bit of a kick.  Plus, it wasn't that difficult to make.  I didn't even have to pause Supernatural while making it.

For the crafting side, I present to you these jars.  On one is the Star Trek logo, and on the other is the emblem for the Galactic Empire, from Star Wars.  Yes, I like both.  Don't judge. I carefully cut out stencils that I printed off the interwebs for these bad boys and spray painted them.  Honestly, that logo from the Empire took way longer than it should have, especially when all the detail got lost in the spray painting.

The gathered supplies.

Carefully getting the Federation Emblem in place.

So anxious to get this done, I just kinda slapped that baby on there.  Notice the super attractive locale?  That's the unfinished corner of our basement, where I did the spray painting.  It's the only place in the house I can do crafty stuff like this without admonishment to lay down a ream of protective paper.  One of the downfalls of living with the parents, I suppose.

Now, we wait for the paint to dry!

The final products!

Like an idiot, I spray painted the inside of the Star Trek jar, so it's a little difficult to see the emblem.  However, the light shines through it really well, so instead of using it as a pencil holder, as I originally planned, I might use it as a candle holder.  The other one, well, is a testament to why spray painting fiddly stencils never really works out.  It's not awful, but the lines aren't as crisp as I'd like.

Not a bad day for testing pins, I guess.  Join me for some knitting adventures, which I'll update soon.  Thanks y'all, and may your Tumblr be full of fandom gifs!

Goths are Knitters Too!

(Sorry for the spotty posting.  Please accept a new post every night this week, with my humblest apologies.)

I've become a knitting fool in the past couple of weeks.  I've amassed a huge amount of acrylic yarn from my friends and have bought several books on knitting, including the newest Stitch 'n Bitch book (check it out-the author is fantastic, and the patterns are gorgeous!).  I knit everywhere now.  One of my friends saw me knitting recently, and said something along the lines of she doesn't want to learn how to knit because it's too domestic.  I blinked up at her through my layers of black eyeliner, uncrossed my feet with the studded leather boots, and set down the black yarn.  I was knitting a voodoo doll (pattern here).  Really?  What's domestic about a knitting Goth?

I'm part of the generation of knitters who are determined to inform the world that knitting is no longer something grandmothers do: it's something everyone can do.  It's something everyone can enjoy doing.  On my choice to follow a semi-Goth lifestyle (i.e., I know how to tune it down for the family functions--don't want to shock Grandma too much!), I chose this life because I'm in mourning for this generation, this generation of teenage pregnancy and all-around stupidity.  With knitting, I feel like I'm reshaping the world a bit.  Kinda of a haha!  You idiotic people with your Prada purses, what can you make out of an animal's fur?  Nothing.  I can create beauty.  All you can do is look stupid.

In this vein of antidisestablishmentarianist knitting, I have found an amazing website full of crafting projects for us Goths, punks, and sociopaths.  The aforementioned voodoo doll is from that site.  There's food recipes, knitting patterns, crochet patterns, sewing charts, and all sorts of stuff that say, "Eff you, society!"  It's called the Anti-Craft, which is such a fitting name.  If you feel the need to pick up two pointy (or four pointy!) needles of death and doom, head on over there.  Reclaim knitting for those who can create beauty from almost nothing.  While you're at it, knit a voodoo doll for that jerk of a boss.  It's a healthier way of taking out your feelings than to his face.

I. Hate. Yellow.

I've got a lovely fun new game to play.  It's called "How many pieces of yellow clothing can we shove on the Knitting Apprentice?"  Let's start....

1. This fabulous leg-warmer that's really supposed to be a a gauntlet.  It's crocheted, and waaaaay too long to be worn comfortably in this heat.  It got too hot, so it was moved to my leg.  The pattern, crocheted, can be found here.

2. After spending 6 hours on that gauntlet that completely covered my arm, my other arm felt lonely, so I quickly crocheted this little arm-garter thing.  It's a 29 chain, slip stitched to the first stitch to create a circle.  Then I turned and single crocheted in the second stitch from the needle, and in every stitch, to the end.  Joined with a slip stitch, and turn.  Now it gets tricky.  Chain 1, and single crochet in the second stitch from needle.  Then, chain 6, skip 3 stitches, and single crochet in the 4th stitch.  Do this all the way around, and join with a slip stitch.  Chain 3 and turn.  Double crochet in 4th stich, chain one.  Then, double crochet 3 times in the ch-6 space, and chain one.  Join and repeat the second row.  Then repeat the row before it, only with single crochet.  Bind off and weave in all ends. Sorry that's so techincal and dry.  I'm getting to the point, eventually!

3.  This is the Sunshine Barf Hat.  My little sister didn't wear it in her play, so I decided it needed the chance to shine on stage.  It gets a bit hot, but it completes my Secret-Agent Ninja Goth Who look.  Just keep reading!

4. Do you see the awful highlighter color of this skirt?  Don't worry, there's another skirt underneath that one.  Black, of course.  I need to balance out all this happiness.

5. To complete it all, there's a preppy collared yellow shirt, and yellow yarn woven in my four braids.

So now that we've established that there's an unholy amount of yellow on me, would you like to learn why?  Fine, I'll tell you.

I am a Who in the local guy school's production of Seussical.  All I do is chill on the tiny little speck and sing, but it works for me.  Our instructions, as far as costuming, was to think yellow.  I, as the title of this blog may suggest, hate yellow with a fiery burning passion.  I like dark colors.  I will continue to despise my costume to my dying day.  Just so you know.  Black=good.  Yellow sunshine=baaaaaaad.  So until opening night this Thursday, I'll keep sneaking black into my outfit, until the director notices and stops the encroaching dark tidal wave.  He's old though, so let's see what I can sneak by him.  Until then, happy knitting!

Sunshine Barf Hat

I'm feeling Mondays.  Mondays work for you?  Good, because Mondays work for me better too.  Now, let's get onto my latest project!
Last Friday something wonderfully wonderful happened.  I went to a fabric store, expecting to be bored, since, you know, I can't machine sew yet.  While I still have two sewing project kit things waiting under my bed to be transformed from flat boring fabric into a gorgeous tank top and hobo bag, I still do not know how to operate the sewing machine stowed away in the basement.  Once my mother's pride and joy, it now sits alone, freezing in the frigid back bedroom, crying from neglect as my mother is just 'too busy' to finish the many project piling up, like, say, curtains for my room?
But I digress.  What potentially would have been a painfully boring trip actually turned out pretty good, considering the fabric store had a yarn section!  I love yarn!  But you know what I love more than yarn?  Other people buying yarn for you!  See, my little sister is in a production of Willie Wonka for her grade school, where she is the annoying twit who is shrunk in the television.  If you don't know what I'm talking about, shame on you!  Go have a childhood and read some Ronald Dahl!  So the director is trying to make the doll they're making of a front and back shot of my sister more life-like by adding brown hair and a hat matching the one she will be wearing.  The only problem with this is, of course, that they do not have a set of matching beanie-type caps.  So my mother volunteers me.  Yay.  I have to stop working on a fabulously gorgeous pair of wristwarmers (stay tuned!) to work on a hat the color of Sunshine Barf.  My little sister named it, and that is how it shall be referred to as evermore.
I'm kinda winging the pattern, casting on 80 stitches on a set of size 7 double-pointed needles.  Right now, I'm just working a 2x2 rib for 7 inches, then I'll turn to the plethora of online patterns for tips on how to shape the hat.  I found a couple of patterns for American Girl Doll beanies, so I guess I'll use those.  The bad thing about all of this?  Opening night is THIS WEEKEND.  Meaning I must give up silk-painting in my Fiber Arts class, which we just started, to work on the Sunshine Barf Hat.
The only upside of this is that my mother bribed me.  I'm weak, I know!  But she bought me all sorts of goodies, like a cool college knitting book, some nice size 2 bamboo double-pointed needles and a ball of superwash merino wool/ bamboo/ nylon sock weight yarn for a pair of Harry Potter-inspired socks, and a niftalicious knit-a-pair-of-boots kit.  Unfortunately, I don't have the right size needles for that yet, but oh well.  It's time to go back to knitting the Sunshine Barf Hat and watching The Suite Life on Deck instead of preparing for the ACT this weekend!
(edit: I'm trying out a new format for this blog.  If you don't like it, or, if you do like it, please comment on it so I can improve!  Thanks!)

Apology Time

Wow, I'm such a failure.  I have failed to post anything, kinda like starving a baby bird after helping it pop out of its egg.  How awful and cruel of me.  So, I've decided that Sundays shall be posting days, with plenty and plenty of suprise posts.  However, because of my huge and blatant failure, every day from now until Sunday there will be a post, to get all the half-written posts out of the saved folder and onto the interwebs.
So I've found that knitting has really helped me destress, so I knit after school as a bit of a study break.  I just sit there watching bad Disney Channel shows (think Suite Life on Deck and Wizards of Waverly Place-don't judge!) and I'm magically transported off into a warm universe of cables and ribbing.  There, I forget all the trouble that's been popping up in my life lately.  I've even started dreaming in this magical yarny land.  Yesterday was almost completely stress-free, as I knitted for 3 out of 6 class periods.
What exactly was I knitting yesterday?  Well, that's a post for Sunday!  All I'll say is that it was my first attempt at cables, and it is turning out beautifully!  Stay tuned!

Let's Get This Started!

In the real world, I would be considered quite talented in the fiber arts, but let's be real, these days, real talent isn't all that necessary.  So in the knitting, sewing, and crocheting circles, I'm quite inept.  I am, for lack of a better term, an apprenctice to those great knitting goddesses, Purlia and Castoffa.  I'm trying to please them, because, well, the alternative, of spending hours on an ugly or ill-fitting project is just horrifying.
Right now, the only fun class I am taking is Fiber Arts.  That class is my life, and it's where I got back into sewing.  Sure, I sewed a bit as a child, but those 'samplers' on the stiff cross-stitch fabric that ended up jumbled messes hardly count.  Now, I can feel semi-proud of what I'm making.  We started with samplers, which I sadly don't have a picture of.  I do however, have a picture of my current project for the class.

We were supposed to create a square inspired by our school.  The pencil lines I drew a couple of weeks ago are starting to rub away, so I need to redraw them.  What you see now is the crest of my school.  Eventually, there will be a greyish cross behind it with the word 'Sisterhood' written across the bottom.  The white edging is all in french knots, suggested by a fellow classmate.  Bad idea, people, bad idea!  No one should have that much time to kill!
So anyways, what makes me an apprentice?  I've been knitting for about 5 years now, and crocheting for a little less than that.  Crocheting, actually, I can do pretty well.  It's the knitting that worries me.  Blocking terrifies me, and don't get me started on cable and double-pointed needles!  But, I am willing to try, to spread my glorious fiber wings!
Let's see, what other projects do I have going on right now?  Well, I'm working on a pair of 'Frothy Gothy Wristwarmers' (link to come later), a pair of MIA striped socks, and a crochet Harry Potter Scarf.  If you want to hear more about those, and other projects, stick around....